Finding Him, Finding Me: A memoir About Love, Laughter
by Leo Weston
A memoir in which Leo Weston traces a series of romantic relationships and the gradual, sometimes chaotic process of understanding himself alongside them.
$4.00 on AmazonRead our full reviewAt a glance
LuvemBooks Verdict
Best for
Readers drawn to LGBTQ+ life-writing who want a memoir rooted in the social history of queer London — specifically the gay pub scene during the HIV crisis — and who value chosen family and friendship given the same emotional weight as romantic love.
Worth it if
Worth reading if you respond to memoir voices that hold raw honesty and infectious humour in the same breath, and can follow rapid tonal pivots between comedy and grief without needing a more measured, contemplative pace.
Skip if
Skip it if you prefer memoir structured around linear reflection and retrospective distance — Weston's emotional immediacy and quick shifts between hilarity and heartbreak may feel disorienting rather than invigorating.
What readers & critics say
Amazon.co.uk readers are enthusiastically positive, consistently praising Weston's "raw and refreshingly honest" writing and "unflinching ability to look inward, finding wisdom and hope in even their most chaotic moments," with multiple reviewers describing it as unputdownable and emotionally affecting in the same sitting.
Sources: Amazon.co.ukAsk LuvemBooks
Was this helpful?
- Is it worth reading?
- For readers drawn to queer memoir that refuses martyrdom or tidy resolution, Finding Him, Finding Me is a compelling and emotionally generous read. Amazon reviewers consistently describe it as unputdownable, with multiple readers reporting crying and laughing within the same sitting, and at least one calling it the best book of the year. The key caveat is tonal: Weston's rapid pivots between hilarity and grief are a deliberate stylistic choice, and readers who prefer linear reflection or measured emotional distance may find the pace and immediacy more demanding. Those willing to follow those shifts will find a memoir with real historical weight and a warmth that extends well beyond the central love story.
- Similar books
- Readers who connect with Finding Him, Finding Me may want to explore other memoirs that blend vulnerability, humour, and emotional honesty. My Year of Really Bad Dates: A Memoir by Rachel Lithgow shares the same comedy-meets-candour register in navigating love and self-discovery. Out of the Corner: A Memoir by Jennifer Grey and Strangers Again: A Memoir of Marriage, Betrayal, and Becoming Whole by SAM JOE both offer the kind of unflinching personal reckoning with identity and relationships that Weston's memoir delivers. For broader context on the HIV crisis era, And the Band Played On by Randy Shilts and How to Survive a Plague by David France provide authoritative historical accounts of the same period, though from a journalistic rather than personal memoir perspective.
- Who should read this?
- Finding Him, Finding Me is designed, as the review puts it, for readers who want queer memoir that does not trade in martyrdom or tidy resolution. It will resonate most with readers interested in LGBTQ+ life-writing, the social history of queer London, and memoirs that treat chosen family and friendship as seriously as romantic love. Readers who enjoy memoir voices that are simultaneously raw and funny — and who are comfortable with rapid tonal shifts between comedy and grief — will find Weston's approach especially rewarding. It is not the right fit for readers who prefer measured, contemplative memoir pacing or emotional distance from the material.
- About Leo Weston
- Leo Weston is the author of Finding Him, Finding Me, a memoir exploring love, self-acceptance, and survival set against London's gay pub scene during the height of HIV stigma. The book captures themes of chosen family, laughter, and personal transformation. Weston's writing has been described as authentic, relatable, and uplifting.
- What are the main themes?
- The memoir's central themes are queer love, chosen family, and self-acceptance — all examined against the specific backdrop of London's gay pub scene during the height of HIV stigma. Weston treats chosen family not as a lifestyle preference but as a survival mechanism, and the review notes that 'the portrayal of chosen family and queer friendship receives as much attention as the central love story with William.' Underlying these personal themes is a broader meditation on the relationship between laughter and survival — on how humour can function not as a deflection from pain but as the only available response to genuine danger.
- Which edition should I buy?
- The memoir exists in more than one edition with variant subtitle wordings — known variants include A Memoir of Love, Laughter and Becoming and A Memoir About Love, Chaos and Questionable Decisions — which the review notes may cause minor confusion for readers comparing copies. The current Kindle edition is identified as a second edition, suggesting some evolution of the text across iterations. Readers comparing notes with others should confirm which edition they are each working from, as minor differences may exist between versions.
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Age & Reading Level
Recommended age
Adult
Reading level
Adult
Content to know about
Best for: Adults — the memoir's engagement with HIV stigma, queer survival, and grief alongside adult romantic relationships makes it best suited to adult readers.
Skip if you prefer memoir with a measured, contemplative pace and consistent emotional tone rather than rapid shifts between comedy and grief.
Editorial Review
Leo Weston's memoir Finding Him, Finding Me is a candid, humor-laced account of queer love, chosen family, and self-acceptance set against the backdrop of London's gay pub scene during the height of HIV stigma — a story that readers on Amazon describe as funny, deeply moving, and impossible to put down.
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